Sunday, August 28, 2005

Conversation With Yoda

One of my MySpace friends has a link to a site where you can have a conversation with Yoda. I only had a few minutes before leaving to visit a friend who is ill so I decided to see if Yoda had any good advice for me. I assumed that a conversation with Yoda would be difficult so I was determined to keep my questions straight and to the point. I didn’t think I would get as frustrated as I did… but see for yourself:

RS: How can I help my sick friend?

Y: Mmm. Friends you have there.

RS: How can I help?

Y: Pass on what you have learned.

RS: What if I haven’t learned anything?

Y: I am wondering, why are you here?

RS: What is the meaning of life?

Y: Remember your failure at the cave!

RS: How can I help my sick friend?

Y: Pass on what you have learned.

RS: Why did you change your answer?

Y: I am wondering, why are you here?

RS: Why do you repeat yourself?

Y: Luminous beings are we... not this crude matter.

RS: Now you're not making any sense.

Y: Mmm. Friends you have there.

RS: Are we going in circles?

Y: Luminous beings are we... not this crude matter.

RS: Do you have anything new to say?

Y: Decide you must how to serve them best. If you leave now, help them you could. But you would destroy all for which they have fought and suffered.

RS: Are you the wisest of the wise?

Y: Help you I can. Yes, mmmm.

RS: Any last words before I leave?

Y: That is the way of things...the way of the Force.

RS: Goodbye.

Y: That is why you fail.

RS: Huh?

Y: No more training do you require. Already know you that which you need.

RS: Got it. Bye.

Y: But beware of the dark side. Anger...fear...agression. The dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight.

RS: Why do you wait to say things until I am about to leave?

Y: Then, only then, a Jedi will you be. And confront him you will.

RS: Now I feel like you're just giving me predetermined answers!

Y: Your weapons...you will not need them.

RS: You are not paying attention to a word I'm saying, are you?

Y: Oh, you will be. You will be.

RS: OK. I've had enough. This is ridiculous. I'm outta here!

Y: If you end your training now, if you choose the quick and easy path, as Vader did, you will become an agent of evil.

RS: So be it.

---------------

So that's it folks - I'm joining the forces of evil. I guess that's what happens when you try to talk philosophy with a ficticious pint sized green monster who talks in backwards nonsensical cliches. See for yourself right here. but don't say I didn't warn you!

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Can Someone PLEASE Lend me $78,000.00?

When we moved back from Israel to the USA four years ago we inherited a dining room table from our grandparents. It was really uncomfortable (notice how the word table is hidden right in that word as if 'uncomfortable' was invented to describe this situation!). So, in frustration at not being able to actually sit at this table we threw it out. Since then we have been eating at a plain folding table - the kind you can get in Costco only theirs is made out of plastic and doesn't cause your back to go out every time you try to move it an inch or two.

And now, finally, my long search is over. I have found the perfect table for my family but I need to borrow some money - so if you have an extra $78,000.00 lying around can you please get in touch with me ASAP!

Click to enlarge

This table is really worth the money as you can plainly see from the New York Times article about it included below. And please do not try to convince me that the cheap $12,000.00 imitation would be just as good. Because it wouldn't be.

------------------------------------------------------------------------
August 21, 2005
Pool Table

By PILAR VILADAS
One of the splashier debuts at this year's Milan furniture fair was that of the London company Established & Sons. Contrary to what its name implies, it is run by young upstarts who want to showcase the best of British design and manufacturing talent. The show stopper of its first collection was easily the Aqua table by Zaha Hadid, the architect famous for her dynamic, fluid forms and compositions. While Hadid is no stranger to furniture design -- her chandelier for the Italian firm Sawaya & Moroni was another of the fair's most-talked-about items -- she has outdone herself here. The polyurethane-resin table's arches and asymmetrical curves imply a liquid quality that is rendered even more vivid by its swimming-pool-blue silicone-gel top. ''It's like flying over water,'' Hadid says. And from a less metaphorical point of view, the table's structure allows the top to cantilever well out over the base, so people can sit at the corners without bumping their knees.

This limited-edition blend of poetry and practicality will set you back about $78,000, excluding taxes and shipping. But one of the more interesting aspects of Established & Sons is its insistence on making both couture and off-the-rack versions of its products. So, come next month, mere mortals will be able to buy an all-polyurethane table, minus the gel top, for about $12,000. Think of it as a building for your dining room.

Tuesday, August 9, 2005

We're in the Space Age now...

OK here we go

Sometimes a close my hunting that and I think to list of this software is not understand in the

Not a bit staff but I think we need to clarify a number of things I wonder if this would work better if I spoke very very clearly it looks like it would.

I will try to write the law that dictating that’s

I am trying to use voice recognition software – I have not yet trained in this software the race word known known no No No No! I am trying to use a voice recognition software in that I have not yet trained to properly recognize my voice.

Because this software can’t recognize my voice yet it is making funny mistakes although of course when I describe that it is making mistakes suddenly it doesn’t make any mistakes of all. There! You see what I mean? At the problem: for power is now though they we going in,, the on how how high No let’s get the straight this is kind of ridiculous isn’t it’s it’s it to only good is this is frustrating that that that

They think my billing No!

I think mind Bill of the No!

I think my golden No this solution when

I think my goal of the No!

Mine Dylan No!

[OK – I’m inserting here by hand that for the record what I was trying to say there was that my dog could probably take dictation better than this software, and I don’t even have a dog!]

Helped No helped just helped just help with held in the de with All to only get will mind done Old gonna

The end.) That Medium (I hope this gets better)…